Ok, so things like started out normal in Chapter 44 with JB doing some Mime Bowling (don't ask, you really don't want to know) while Chris and Sandy spend the holidays with her parents in Massechus Masachu New England where he met her folks and had tea while JB and most of the Furlong went shopping which is what Chris probably would have rather done instead of touring Torryton which was the town that Sandy and her sisters grew up in and is really nice except for the fact that it's kind of a hole right now but then Chris tries to make a move on Sandy and she's all "Look we're in a working thing and all" which I think took Chris by total surprise but no where near as much surprise as when JB ran into Bob after the mall and managed to convince the army of invading aliens to start up a show in Branson, Mo. which got Krullux more than a little annoyed so he zapped JB and the chapter ended.

Then in Chapter 45, we started off in like a movie or something which was sort of weird, but then Chris meets the Justice Furlong which is like totally not what he expected because they're like sitting in his living room which fortunately the naked guy hiding in the trashcan with a half full container of Chinese food which I don't think should be served with punch which is what Chris did when he found out that JB got zapped by the shattered remains of Krullux's robot thingy which was currently sitting on Bob's workshop bench after Bob fell asleep at the wheel of his truck.

Oh, and someone who like talks like The Detective like got a sharkskin suit and some other guys like had a thing against the New England Candle Company or something and then things got really sad and I had to go watch Joe Millionare.

In Chapter 46, The Detective is back in Seattle where he breaks into a dirty office and blows a few hours polishing his gun, while Roger and Karl keep an uncomfortably close eye on Zrng who tell them to like leave him alone so the can get the shopping done which both Roger and Karl think is weird what with giant robots of doom (literally) like looking for him all over and stuff, but Karl takes a hike anyway while Sandra talked to Becky Sue and convinced her that like most major issues, shopping is always a good solution.

Then there was like this weird scene involving this guy named the Pitfall Perp. I'm not like sure either.

Back up in Seattle, Myron dealt with the local police who arrested him because he got in the way of the Blue Stallion who was like totally wailing on the bad guy and of course Myron was totally tee'd off by it until he found out that there are like tons of old cases and things against him (because like I guess he was an even bigger jerk before) and then uhm, something happened with me and like my great grandpa because like he forgot to take his perscription again.

Once I got great grandpa changed, things picked up in Chapter 47, with the bunch of devil guys planning a really bad pun, which unfortunately they released, but instead they didn't do it and went for summoning a creature from the underworld which is a little like crossing Buffy with Lawrence Welk which is like totally weird and now I can't watch movies like The Omen without hearing accordian music, which is almost as bad as the way that Bob felt after finding out that he's apparently been too good to be a bad guy and is placed on academic probation but he sort of beats up the Dean but not nearly as bad as Chris beats up some thugs that were trying to mug some poor woman (and if you ask me, he let them off too easy, the creeps) and speaking of creeps the Detective tries to help out in Portland and nearly succeeds in cracking it when a guy with a big glowy piece of fish or something beats him to it which meant that he'd gone to yet another city and not been able to get himself a job which leaves him feeling totally the opposite of the way that Becky Sue felt after finding out that JB is alive (sort of) and he left her with just a teddy.

No, you perv! the like big stuffed bear. I swear you people like totally have your minds in the gutter sometimes.

So anyway in Chapter 48, the evil shriner guys wind up summoning like hell's version of the designer guy from HGTV who's like a total screamer, which apparently so is the guy those evil shriner guys summoned, but not for the same reasons at all and speaking of screamers we then go to the emergency room of some clinic that's like all chock full of guys that the Grayhound has apparently been beating the crap out of which Chris found out about by deafening nearly everyone in downtown Boise as he tried to listen to his messages until Becky Sue pulls a JB and shows Chris the like totally simple way that only involves seventeen hands and a moderate sacrifice but then Chris starts getting all happy as the reporters start talking about how bad the bad guys are getting beat up with makes both JB and Becky Sue (who are like kinda-sorta shacked up and stuff but not really if you understand which I'm not totally sure I do) really angry because good guys just don't beat the crap out of bad guys unless they're like superbad and not just like jaywalkers and stuff, but more importantly Chris learns that JB is alive, kinda, sorta, in a way, but then Becky Sue suddenly gets called away as Chris hears a report about something and when he (Chris) leaves he gets chewed out by the woman from the DoSH.

Meanwhile, Myron has lunch in Reno with a guy who makes stuff blow up and his girlfriend who has a leather fetish.

Anyway in Chapter 49, like Fred deecides to have a tea party with Boise, only like it's the whole city instead of just like the folks in it, which was like pretty and all, but not as exciting as what Zrng was going through being chased by the Y-Guys but it turned out to be ok because like Roger was following him (which would be sort of creepy if it wasn't for the fact that he was saving his bacon) but what was really weird was the fact that JB was there and he was the one that got Becky Sue and Karl's attention and they were holding their own against the Y-Guys even though they were just trying to get Zrng out so that wasn't really the thing that Chris had heard about which must have been Fred's tea party but it's ok since Zrng ran by when Chris was being beaten up by Fred and they sort of tag teamed off and there were these two huge epic battles that, uhm, the author just like didn't talk about, but afterwards Chris was like all sorts of beat up when the guy who'd been hanging outside the loft for a month finally attacked, but Chris beat that too which kind of made the guy cry. Oh, and the big place setting was a huge hit, even if the Evil Shriners didn't think so.

What, like a girl can't like take some time off for exams and stuff without someone leaving like an answering machine full of nastygrams? Like, it's a good thing he's like married and stuff..

So in Chapter 50, Sandy drives to visit her sisters who are like at The Facility which is like a combination of private school and a totally sucky mall that's all like abandoned and stuff which sorta makes sense because it's actually a prison which has like super-duper security and is all creepy like a Steven King novel that makes sense (which would be like totally creepy since his stuff never does make sense but that's beside the point) and when she does finally get to see her sisters, they like all break down into tears which was totally sad, but not as sad as the fact that Becky Sue was driven to the point of forcing Chris to eat after he got all beat up by like the demonic version of Christopher Lowell but he's all like studying (Like I was Mr. 'Fictional-Characters-Don't-Take-Exams' Person!) maps when Sandy came back and said hello with a pile of high speed rocks.

Then in Chapter 51, Chris trades lying under rocks for lying on wet mud, which like is not a good trade if you ask me, when he meets up with Bob and they both get a little wetter than they planned, so they decide to go have pie and coffee at a roadside cafe that I think had the angriest dog in the world outside of it and Chris and Bob realize that they both are on the same wavelength about The Facility, which is pretty much opposite of Sandy and Becky Sue since Becky Sue found something in Chris' pants that Sandy had thought she wanted but wait a minute, that just sounds so like wrong and stuff. Ok. so it's not like.. that.. or anything and ew-ew-ew anyway so Chris and Bob instead decide to go push a laundry cart through a big open field while it was raining and giant robots attacked.

Which lead into Chapter 52, where JB spends some quality time with Roger discovering why Roger's five o'clock shadow is a bit more present than most folks and why he has a hard time finding shoes that fit right (Like don't ask, I'm not really sure I totally understand that one either) but meanwhile Bob and Chris run full speed into one of the buildings at The Facility... (Wait, no they like run through a door, because running into a building totally hurts.) and discover that The Facility is not being attacked, but rather it's just a group of superhero janitors picketing for unionized labor. So Chris and Bob kinda wander around for a while until they meet up with one of Bob's old classmates, Chris runs away and Bob is tackled by a heavily armed administrator.

Ok, like I have been sooo busy. My Mom like wanted me to do something to prepare for the like real world and all so like had to go get a job. I mean I was all like, 'I am a journalist, Mother. Look! Blog! Duh.' But she was like all 'Whatever' and now I've got to go put on the like dorkiest of outfits and serve wieners on sticks to kids at the mall.

Granted, things looked worse for Bob and Chris in Chapter 53, since like the raid like nearly took out the Facility but then the staff totally kicked in and made sure that all the bad guys.. err.. residents.. were being kept safe and stuff which was totally opposite of what like Bob thought, and speaking of opposite, like Chris wound up springing Sandy's sisters, after they like beat him up because they didn't know who he was but he managed to do it, and even get Bob back since he was hanging out with an old school buddy of his who was too polite to toss him out and then Chris and Bob like split up almost like they were friends or something.

I was... totally confused. I mean totally confused. Like the kind of confused I was after I came out of watching Matrix Reloaded confused (Although I thought the like Footloose tribute in the middle was cool!! ;) ) Well, hopefully things will make sense later.

You know, it might just be this stupid hat thingy I have to wear. I swear the colors make me like see stuff that's not there and all. Like I had this totally weird thing about a walking salad bar defending a city's shin guards...

Ok, first off, I think I need to do some explaining. I know that like some folks have been saying that I've been a slacker and stuff for not doing my job and telling you all the stuff that's been going on for a few chapters and all, particularly when like things went on serious hold for a while there, but you have to understand, it was like a total crisis.

You know how sometimes you wake up on a really, really dry day, and then you run out of conditioner, and then there's like a black out so you can't use the blow drier or curling iron or like anything so you put your hair back and then like the scrunchy thing gets like totally caught in it and you make an emergency stop at the parlor because you're like a total mess and you've got like college interviews and stuff only the girl that normally does your hair isn't there so you get this like random persony person that like doesn't really understand you and like is wearing a kerchief on her head but she seems really nice until she takes out the sheep shears...

Look. I had a really bad hair day. Not like "wear a hat" bad or even "it'll grow out" bad. A REALLY bad hair day.

I needed time to recover, to get back to my happy place.

And if you have any doubts, just ask my court appointed therapist.

So, like, where were we?

Oh, right!

So like in Chapter 54 JB gets off the phone with his parents, only it's not really JB it's Roger since JB is still stuck inside of everyone except for Chris who's not really stuck at all so much as he's running across rooftops and swinging down onto the street so that he can narrowly avoid running into people and wind up cleaning the table for The Detective, who has him look at a story about a bunch of, like stinky scary hippie folks who are like undead so I'm guessing that they're even more stinky than normal if that's possible, and speaking of stinky Zrng got a reply from his like boss or something which seemed to be pretty like uncreative and stuff, unlike Plaskowitz who like had to meet with his boss and found out that he (like Plaskowitz) is going to be doing like some on-location work.

Then in Chapter 55 Becky Sue and JB find out what's happened to Sandy's sisters which sounds like they seem they're out of trouble, or maybe like they're really in trouble since like they find out why folks who leave the Facility don't return which is the last thing that Plaskowitz wants to do (like return to the Shareholder) even if Plaskowitz is like sitting at the bottom of the ocean staring at nothing but black, cold and wet things like Margie's nose which was also what Bob's wife was staring at before she like went into the garage and backhanded him for being like a total jerk and stuff, which honestly, I'm thinking someone needs to do with Chris since he was on the phone with USHA trying to stop the musical number which might have a chorus line as big as all the rubber duckies they let loose, but probably without as many injuries.

Speaking of ways to get hurt, or like avoid it, Chapter 56 starts off with Becky Sue going downstairs to Annie's where she gets a gift from him which wasn't as oogy as it might sound considering that he whipped out his pistol, err, her pistol. Pistols. Uhm, look, Annie got her guns. And speaking of unexpected surprises, Chris took the Furlong for a ride in his car and like became REALLY happy he paid extra for the Scotch-guarding. Of course where they went was to deal with the devilish duckies, and dealt with the duckies they did, but the darn duckies didn't deem to be done, so to undo the ducky doom Chris blew a fuse.

Actually, he blew a lot of them.

So they left.

Of course, it meant that he needed to explain a few things, so in Chapter 57, he lied, which I like guess doesn't really get him like a lot of points in the whole "hero" category, but I'm like totally sure he has is like reasons and stuff. I mean, like he's a good guy and all, and I'm sure that the bill would like way more than he makes and stuff. And besides, I saw on the TV how Alpha man saved the town from the duckies, which you know, I kinda found weird because I thought that the Grayhound was responsible or something, but then I found out that Plaskowitz was watching Spongebob only he wasn't watching Spongebob so much as it was The Shareholder telling him that he'd gotten into a little deal with a ruthless pirate and was going light up Plaskowitz' home world if he (Plaskowitz) didn't have a few copies of Bob's engine ready in a few months, which I'm guessing meant that Plaskowitz was also glad he had paid extra for the Scotch-guarding. And then Karl went on a bad interview and Bob sat around thinking.

Which turned out to be OK, because in Chapter 58, Karl talked to Roger about some crap, Zrng came back full of crap, and Becky Sue was suspicious about some other crap. All in all, kind of a crappy episode.

But in Chapter 59, Chris follows most of the Furlong while Myron follows Chris and they all head into a warehouse where Bob meets the Furlong, and some scary stuff happens and I should write more but I've really got to go pee.