Dear Auntie Ora,

I have this co-worker who's just... amazingly stupid. I've just about reached my limit with him. Last week we had to take him to the hospital because when the phone rang, he answered his stapler and stapled his earlobe to his head. I won't even get into his difficulties with the photocopier.

Any advice for coping with dim-witted coworkers?


I, like, so understand what you mean!

You're so lucky that you only have to deal with one guy like that. Sure, I mean, the two I work with always act so superior and all, but really I know better. Sybil is always, like "Cassandra, dear, what have I told you about answering questions?" and "Ms. McBlonde, the telephone is not a toy", but she's totally clueless about who LFO are.

And you think Pythia could even NAME one of the PowerPuff girls? Nuh-uh! I mean, really, the girl wears boots all the time!

Nope, I'm the one that found the neat cupholder on the computer, and figured out that the best way to organize the files is by customer height rather than that boring alphabetical questiony thing. I'm also the one that found out that when you're low on toner for the copier, you can use the dust from the coffee bags, and visa versa. I also figured out that you don't need to go buy staples when you can snip up paperclips to fit!

But anyway, back to your question. It's hard to confront folks like that in the office. Sometimes because they say things like: "Ms. McBlonde, one does not masticate whilst speaking to clientele on the telephone." or "Cassidy, What the 'ell is coming out of the hole in your desk!?" or there's a sale at the Mall, but I think I'd say something like, "Hey Ms Not-so-smarty-pants, you don't wear angora with army boots!" or "If you're such a smart person, why do you always forget how tall our clients are?"

Oops, there's the fax machine! I better go get my pop-tarts!

Good Luck, and Thank You for using Delphic Research, Inc., for all your research needs. Oh, and sorry about the smudges on the invoice, they're blueberry.